May be I am dramatic after all, but most of all am exhausted.
I am tired of trying to be a million different things that I have no desire to be but feel mandated to be – does this make sense?
I struggle to identify what to make for dinner, even though I’d be quite happy to eat potato chips, I struggle into a pair of jeans that cuts off my circulation, I kill myself with a pair of heels just to look sexy. Why do I do all these things I ask myself time and time again. I tell myself that I vowed to be the best wife I can be but the truth is that’s probably not it.
I rationalize my actions with one hundred lines from many a romantic movie, from 1000 quotes from the bible and from my mother’s wisdom. It doesn’t help the jumble of thoughts and the inescapable truth lurking somewhere at the back of my mind that maybe, I am not happy. The thought alone makes me feel guilty, but maybe this blog will put things in perspective for me….
